Who do you call Whānau?
Whānau – most commonly known to many as the Maori word for ‘Family’- but it means so much more than that. For me, Whānau is about people with the same values. Whānau should be who you surround yourself with. Whānau should empower each other to be better people.
So why discuss who we call our Whānau?
In my earlier blog post work harder on yourself than you do on your job , I wrote about a key step to finding happiness and fulfilment in life & work is to surround yourself with people on the same buzz as you and give the big BYE FELICIA to those who aren’t.
There’s no point in working on yourself when the people you surround yourself with aren’t helping you to become a better person or add value to your life.
We’ve all met one or a coupley. The constant complainer, the Negative Nancy, the Close minded Carol. The person who is never motivated to do anything. The emotionally draining friend who you can only deal with in small doses. The person you need to have “ so you can leave plans” straight after your encounter so you have an excuse to hit the road.
Start questioning your circle. Whether they be friends, family, colleagues or acquaintances. What value do they bring to your life? Do they make you happy? Do they challenge you to be a better person? Are they supportive? Real? Positive? Do they celebrate your success?
Or – are they the complete opposite?
Now lets be real we can all have a bad day with our resting bitch faces. Trying to stay positive and motivated constantly is hard. So maybe its best to ask who you would want around on a bad day? Someone who would make it worse? Or someone who get’s you back on track and pumped for the rest of the day?
The same goes for social media. In the past month I’ve started following people on the same buzz as me. I love being inspired by their posts and motivating suggestions.
Imagine if the people you followed on Insta were constantly posting photos like ‘ ahhhh, I’m so fat as I sit on my arse and do nothing about it ’ or ‘ you shouldn’t be taking a risk and quitting your job, you need to pay the bills.’
What would you do? UNFOLLOW
I’ve loved surrounding myself with people on the same vibe. People who you know are listening to you when you speak and are not just waiting to get their own word in. When you can support and empower each other, you know you’re surrounding yourself with the right people and they are who I call my Whānau.
So once you know who you can call your Whānau, make sure you make time for them too. Know how to get a balance of spending time with them all.
When I was in my 9-5 I was constantly surrounded by work colleagues ( don’t get me wrong I was blessed enough to make some amaze friends at work) and to be honest I didn’t make enough time for the rest of my social circle. This is also another reason why all I thought about was work because there was never a time (whether a break or after work drinks) that someone wouldn’t bring up the topic of work in conversation. This didn’t mean I culled my working group but after balancing time within my whole social circle I find I’m not talking about work all the time.
Start with small steps –
Who do you want to be surrounded by?
Who drains you?
Who makes you happy?
How can you balance your social circle?
Surround yourself with people who you would call your Whānau. If their presence doesn’t add value to your life then their absence wont make a difference.